mental caricatures

Most days I arrive at work and park my car, then it usually takes a while for me to leave the car. Apart from the chores I have to perform in order to leave the car – turn engine off, take seatbelt off, put steering wheel lock on (done religiously since having a car nicked on the one day I forgot to put it on), remove stereo facia and put in bag, remove glasses/shades and put in bag, zip up bag to stop stuff falling out -, I don’t like to rush if i’m not late, and sometimes I like to listen to the rest of the track which was playing in the stereo at the time. If I had a thermos with me and a book I would probably sit and and have a coffee before I get out out of the car – although this sort of behaviour does freak people out. In fact when I had my camper van, I would often get in the back and cook some pasta or something before going into work (but that’s another story).

Anyway, most days just as i’m getting to the point where i’m ready to open the car door and get out, I see this particular person just arriving into the car park, he always manages to put his car in a space and instantly get out, and is halfway across the car park before i’ve climbed out, grabbed my bag and locked the car. I can only presume that he’s already taken off his seatbelt before the car comes to a standstill, and doesn’t require time to organise himself/ faff around like I do.

This morning walking across the car park I conjured up a mental caricature of this guy just bailing out of his car as he passes the car park entrance, so that the car carries on driverless down the road and crashes into a lamp post, and he doesn’t even notice, because he’s long gone. Meanwhile i’m watching this from the comfort of my imaginary winebago, debating whether to fry up a full veggie breakfast.

This made me giggle to myself as I walked into work, resulting in a few weird glances…